A few weeks ago I got my mole remove from the bridge of my nose.
This type of scenario is one that causes me huge anxiety for a number of reasons….
- I hate needles
- I hate needles and it was going in right between my eyes
- I hate needles and it was going in right between my eyes and I wouldn’t be able to run away
- I hate needles and it was going in right between my eyes and I wouldn’t be able to run away and I’d be judged for being pathetic
This mole I knew wasn’t malignant and I wasn’t worried about the mole removal as I’d had it done before… it was the needle between my eyes.
It was, however, growing, painful, kept getting caught in my clothes and my toddler kept pulling at it.
My older kids kept asking me what was inside so I knew it must look funny to them.
The dermatologist offered to remove it on the day I went to have it looked at. I literally couldn’t run out of the hospital quickly enough as I mumbled an excuse about needing to get home.
When they phoned to offer me an appointment a couple of weeks later, I froze and quickly made up an excuse why I couldn’t go.
I got off the phone I realised exactly what was going on as I recognised this was an anxious feeling.
I knew what I was doing was AVOIDING the situation.
AVOIDANCE is the number one tactic people who experience anxiety use when there are situations that make them panic.
The issue with avoidance is that there’s only so long you can avoid a situation before you have to face it.
The fear of something is ALWAYS worse that the situation itself.
And the more you avoid something the bigger and the worse it gets in your head.
You create stories about it, excuses, you look at it from all angles… well I could just leave it, it’s not so bad, but then if I leave it… what about if…. But then I need to face up to the needles… all this headspace taken up for a very simple thing.
I’m sure you can recognise it yourself – the applying for a job/promotion/starting your own business, a difficult interaction with a friend or partner, a social situation, having to talk in public, going to see a doctor/dentist, facing taking your kids somewhere, making a phone call….
I recognised it immediately after I got off the phone that day, that I was avoiding. And the root of it was anxiety.
The thing is when I work with clients is everyone feels there’s a magic solution which means you don’t get activated – that anxiety doesn’t appear.
I do not believe that anyone can be anxiety free 100% of the time.
Anxiety is a safety mechanism that’s inbuilt into all humans (and many animals).
A part of you gets triggered – this is a situation, for whatever reason, feels threatening.
But once you understand this, you can quickly engage your toolkit to know how to handle it.
Once I recognised it for what it was, I went ahead and got it done.
- Compassion – it was totally understandable I would be nervous
- EFT to clear the fear
- I used my ‘evidence-based’ approach of all the times I’ve managed operations and it was fine (3 caesareans, IVF and previous moles removed)
- I reminded myself it would be a temporary thing – it would start and it would stop – it would last literally a few seconds
- I imagined myself in the situation meaning I walked so slowly and calmly into the room
- I explained to the staff I was nervous and they were ACE and I wasn’t embarrassed because I could explain it really clearly
- I hummed through the procedure itself (a brilliant tool to ease anxiety fast)
- I left flipping proud of myself
- Few weeks on, I am SO DELIGHTED I faced it and got it done
I want you to know with the right understanding, you can manage situations that make you anxious so easily.
For now, I’m sharing to you, 10 Easy Ways to Ease Anxiety Fast (which includes the humming)…
Much love, Tricia xxxx