No one is coming

Hope you’re all doing well and managing to limit your news intake. When you think it can get any worse… don’t go on twitter…. (deleted today off my phone finally)…. I personally keep on googling houses for sale in the outer Hebrides and future camping holidays.

Anyhow – here’s what been coming up for me this week in session with clients and my own personal take on things.

Inspired by this quote from the epic Mel Robbins (5 second rule – you can google it – the book covers her ted talk but is a solid read)

“No one is coming to save you. No one is coming to push you. It’s all up to YOU.”

What she means is….

There is no knight in shining armour. There is no saviour. There is no one that can fix it for you.

Butt officially kicked. Ouch.

As much as you might want your husband, wife, partner, mum, sister, friend, colleague, book, podcast, meditation app, course, instagram account or whatever your current strategy is to fix it – NO ONE is going to fix your situation magically if you don’t TAKE THE ACTION.

There is no one that can mind read anything (your partner thinks “yikes what have I done” when you completely lose the plot – they are not objective).

There is no one who knows what’s right for you (yes, doing a meditation app was right for your pal, but not right for you).

There is no one who can do those things you need to do (there is no one that can make the time to journal, breathe, do the yoga or therapy).

The only person responsible for taking you from where you are right now (eg. anxious, angry, lonely, shut down, on your phone too much, bored out of your head or so overwhelmed you can’t get out of bed or crying 24/7) to where you want to be (calm, confident, fulfilled, brave, bold, funny, loving or whatever else it is) is… you.

There’s three things you need to get started.

  1. Capacity – make the time and space to heal and create change (I hear you – you have no time – I don’t believe it – check out your phone stats or Netflix series you’ve binged on or the fact you still have time to iron or do other non-essentials. I’m not judging – but time is a choice – what are you choosing to do with your time? Why are you not important enough to focus in on you? Are you not worthy enough? What beliefs are stopping you from giving you the capacity you so need?
  2. Capability – you need to know what you’re doing. One of the biggest things that stop actions is just not knowing where to start or what to do. It’s like going to the gym. You need to learn to lift 10kg before you can lift 100kg (not that I actually know anything about the, gym but you get my point).
  3. Motivation – how motivated are you for change? How can you take every day action? How can you stay disciplined? What beliefs are stopping you? What might be the gain for self sabotage or staying stuck? What are you afraid might happen? Motivation is complex.

If you’re struggling with these things then working together (that’s you and me together) could be a transformational experience for you that takes you from where you are now (stuck in whatever point of emotional pain) to where you want to be (unstuck to whatever emotional joy you want).

Here’s what one of my current clients said recently (shared with permission)…. “Just wanted to say thank you for yesterday, I feel lighter today. Hard to explain, but as though more of the depression has lifted, I don’t know if it’s to do with yesterday and I can’t quite believe the change in the last few weeks, but I think thanks to you and the work you have done with me it’s the first time in years I have felt this light and less dark and now I realise how dark I was really feeling.”

If you would like to work together, get in touch below.

Much love, Tricia xxx

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