If you weren’t stressed/anxious/overwhelmed… What would you be?

It’s crazy season. Here’s a question.

If you weren’t…. Stressed/anxious/overwhelmed (delete as appropriate)… what would you be?

It’s very easy when you’re feeling a certain way for the brain to tag a feeling then embody that feeling.

If you believe right now you should be feeling stressed/anxious etc then the brain tags it and makes you feel that way because your BELIEFS about this time of year create your reality.

If you believe this should be stressful – your body creates stress and feels stressed.

A quick hack can be to CHOOSE how you want to feel and here’s a simple exercise that I share with my clients and we cover in depth in the SOAR programme.

If you were say feeling EXCITED, CALM, BUZZING for Christmas – you choose… what would that look like?


  • What would that look like in your face, posture, how you’re walking, body, hand gestures?
  • What would it sound like in how you’re speaking?
  • What would others notice about you if they were watching you?
  • What would you be doing?

What’s important about this exercise is not thinking about what you wouldn’t be doing, but what you WOULD be doing.

Such as:

  • I wouldn’t be stressing might be I’d be relaxing with the kids/partner/family
  • I wouldn’t be rushing around might be I’d be moving slowly and taking my time
  • I wouldn’t be shouting might be I’d be laughing at how ridiculous all this is

Those words – relaxing, slow, laughing are POWERFUL as they connect to a different part of the brain.

What that means is it then starts to elicit a different sensation in the body.

One of my clients did this exercise and rather than being a ‘stressed and overwhelmed mum’ she is ‘fun mum’.

If you connect with being ‘fun mum’ that brings up a whole different identify and behaviour within you. It makes you smile, laugh, see things in a different light.

You have the choice to feel how you want to feel – so how do you CHOOSE to feel?

Much love, Tricia xxxx

Other posts you might be interested in…

The importance of having the courage to be disliked

The importance of having the courage to be disliked

One of the things I’ve come to recognise over the years is how important it is to have the courage to be disliked. I know that might not go down well.   And truthfully when I think about it it unsettles me - like nails going down a blackboard. I can feel I want to...

It starts with noticing

It starts with noticing

One of the things I’ve learned over the years is I need to NOTICE how I’m feeling REGULARLY - not just in the moment. Such as - Sometimes I get stuck on my phone - I need to notice why I’m doing that - is it because I feel ‘frozen’, ‘overwhelmed’, ‘fed up’,...

95% of what you do is based on this

95% of what you do is based on this

Did you know that 95% of our actions are based not on what you choose to do but is based on what your subconscious chooses that you do? Sometimes this is SO helpful - you don’t really have to ‘think’ what you’re doing in the morning to get you out the house - your...